The crowds cheer and whistle as we approach the minister to receive what I believe to be, my last ever major trophy in my uniform-wearing life. Flashes of the camera and pats on the back were seemingly going in an infinite time-line. The world seemed to slow down for a little bit at the moment.

To my surprise, “Finally, we’ve won!” was not the thought that was in my head. Instead, it was “Now what am I gonna do?”

You see, “passion” was never the most appropriate word to describe myself doing the things I do, not because I was never a person who doesn’t appreciate the results one can yield with a lot of sweat and tears put into it. But I was never a person who was known as having defined my own “thing“, largely because I can learn to be passionate about something in a shorter time than most people.

And just because of that I can’t help but feel empty about my capabilities most of the time. Being a Jack of many trades and a master of none, isn’t the best that I imagine myself to be.

I’ve recently committed myself to something I’ve been wanting to indulge in for quite a while, but never had the will to take the first step in. Involving a certain amount of investment, even taking the very first step means there is little chance I can turn back the clock on this.

Which should suit me anyhow. Since I’ve always felt passionate about the things I do, only when being thrust upon it without a choice.

Maybe putting myself in this position is the only way I can do this.